Another Day, Another Leaf!

Today was an odd day. It started poorly and ended (so far) well. I still have a stretch to go... (yes, I know, not as much as the rest of the crew but for me this is a stretch), but it is under 4 hours now. Counting down the time, sort of.

I have my hero, Bill Engvall, on. He's a riot. He keeps the humour clean. He does refer to sex and body functions, but never uses words that I can't play at work. I love this man. I'd invite him to my workplace if I could. He loves the sport. But that's just my wishlist.

Anyway, today... I got a lot of stuff done and went out for a drive. I have been itching to see the roads with the glorious autumn leaves. And they are glorious. Oh, my gods, it is staggering. And so I started out on the higher one and took lots of pictures and then headed around the usual loop to the low road. It's beautiful. It's staggering. It is just delightful.

Today was the perfect day: perfect temperature, perfect light breeze, perfect sunshine with just a bit of mackerel clouds (a sign of poor weather within 24 to 48 hours but I'd sell my soul for days like this so a little rain will be a small price to pay), the perfect trees and the perfect grass. It was perfect all around. The idea is to have fun.

So I was delighted. Close ups, far away shots, whatever. I took 160 images of staggeringly beautiful land. What more can I ask for? People work in office buildings that are huge, square, have cubicleland, and are cold and impersonal and have those gods-awful wall art that come from whaddya-call-it. You know, those stupid things like "There's no I in TEAM" - oh, yes, Successories. Ugh! I hate those things. Not me. I am the luckiest person this way.

So I was very happy. I got home, picked up some hummus and chicken tika, watched some of KungFu Panda, and then went to the squadhouse.

I wanted to cry. My crew was so happy to see me and made it clear without actually saying it directly, I was happy - very happy. I got the same reaction at work, too. Everyone was happy to see me back in and all asked me how vacation was and how was I feeling.

That was part of the depressing stuff - it was so obvious to everyone that something was wrong with me. People were asking me if I was sick and had the flu. I think it is more the depression that is making me look like that. And maybe the sleeping issues - quite a winning combination. It seems that while I'm still feeling the depression - which is not completely abnormal under the circumstances - I'm not letting it show so much. And the trip around the leafy grounds certainly helped.

After we did rig check and had chatted for a longer time than normal, which I loved, Bob and I sat outside and talked more. Talking to Bob is great. He is one of my closest friends. I don't think Bob makes deep friendships with the squadmembers that much. It's different and he cares about the stuff that's going on with me. That's a good feeling. And I'm thinking about what happens if he dies. He's not young, you know. And I'm a little raw from John dying. I just am heartbroken by this. And so now I'm thinking of all the older people in my life that are important to me and thinking about how long they may or may not be with me. I guess that is selfish, but I can't help it.

After Bob left, I went into the squad house and asked our "yute", James, if he'd give me a hand with my shopping. I needed cat litter among other things and the bags weigh a ton - for me. They are 20 or 25lbs, which is nothing for normal person... but it is a Sysophian task for me. James and I had a great time walking around, getting what I needed, talking about books, cereal, sugar, whatever. It was great. I finally came home and here I am, blogging and listening to Bill Engvall.

My day so far. Let's see what happens in the next three hours (it's 20:58).