The Etiquette of Regifting
An interesting article:
Make sure the recipient will like it. Most people who regift do so because the gift is perfect for someone else (77 percent), which is what gift giving is all about. "You don't want the recipient to have any feeling at all that you are giving them the castoff," says Peggy Post, etiquette expert and author of Excuse Me, But I Was Next. "At the bottom of all this, it's all about being respectful and considerate." Post is an admitted regifter. In one instance she received two copies of the same book and gave one unwrapped copy to her mother-in-law after explaining the entire situation. It's also acceptable to regift when you are absolutely certain the recipient would like to have that gift, Post says.
Regift to different social circles. If you're going to regift, you need to do it outside of the social circle where you originally received the gift. Some 29 percent of regift recipients recognized the regift because they were present when the gift was first given. "If you were given something by someone in your church group, give it to someone in your school group," says Marsha Collier, a Los Angles-based eBay expert and admitted regifter. "Always send out a thank you note right away and put a Post-it on it so you don't regive it to the same circle of friends."
Make sure it's new. Leon Foerster, an insurance agent in Ripon, Wis., recalls receiving an 8-track player full of cobwebs as a wedding gift-a sure tip-off something is not new. Post recommends you don't regift anything that does not come with its original packaging and instructions. The least you can do is rewrap the gift and put a fresh card on it. A full 16 percent of regifters were spotted because the gift tag had the wrong name on it, Tassimo found. You never want to give away a gift the original giver took great care to select, Post says, such as a homemade sweater or scarf. You should also hold on to handmade and one-of-a kind items. The most common regifted items, Tassimo found, are decorative household knickknacks like vases, paintings, and picture frames.
You can also resell. "One year my daughter was given a Mickey Mouse lamp by a relative who didn't realize she was too old for a Mickey Mouse lamp," says Collier. Her solution: Sell it on eBay. "When we're opening gifts for the holiday there is the eBay pile," says Collier, who usually lists six to eight unwanted Christmas gifts for sale on Christmas Day. "The whole point of someone giving you a gift is to make you happy," she says. "If the gift doesn't make you happy why not sell it on eBay so you can get something that will really make you happy." Only your user ID is visible when you sell something online and eBay also allows you to donate any percentage of the sale to a charity of your choice.
Gift cards are regifted too. Thirty percent of people have regifted gift cards or gift certificates, Tassimo found. Alternatively, you could sell, albeit at a discount, or swap your gift card for a different store on swapagift.com for a $3.99 listing fee, regardless of the amount on the card. "Sellers can turn their gift cards into cash," says Michael Kelly, the president and chief operating officer of the Langhorne, Pa.-based company. "Swappers can trade them for cards they really want."
Laughter is the greatest gift of all. A new website, http://www.regiftable.com/, created by the Houston-based nonprofit organization Money Management International, provides a forum for sharing regifting experiences, which range from horrifying to hilarious. One poster, Jennifer Aither, an insurance agent in Ripon, Wis., has a family tradition of regifting. For nearly 20 years a peanut butter maker has been passed off as a gift at weddings, anniversaries, and birthdays. Aither has it now, but she plans to pass it along to a cousin at an upcoming baby shower. "It's become a huge joke," Aither says. "It was so obvious to me that it was a regift that I had to laugh. It's so tacky, it's funny."
Everyone loves opening a perfectly wrapped package with a shiny bow. But sometimes once you open that gift, it's not exactly what you expected-or even something you want. And after you feign excitement for the obligatory amount of time, what do you do with it? Well, if you're like most Americans, you regift or pass the less-than-stellar present on to someone else who might enjoy it more. A recent Tassimo survey found that a whopping 78 percent of Americans feel that it is acceptable to regift some or most of the time.
So, if you are going to regift this year, here is how to do it right.
Make sure the recipient will like it. Most people who regift do so because the gift is perfect for someone else (77 percent), which is what gift giving is all about. "You don't want the recipient to have any feeling at all that you are giving them the castoff," says Peggy Post, etiquette expert and author of Excuse Me, But I Was Next. "At the bottom of all this, it's all about being respectful and considerate." Post is an admitted regifter. In one instance she received two copies of the same book and gave one unwrapped copy to her mother-in-law after explaining the entire situation. It's also acceptable to regift when you are absolutely certain the recipient would like to have that gift, Post says.
Regift to different social circles. If you're going to regift, you need to do it outside of the social circle where you originally received the gift. Some 29 percent of regift recipients recognized the regift because they were present when the gift was first given. "If you were given something by someone in your church group, give it to someone in your school group," says Marsha Collier, a Los Angles-based eBay expert and admitted regifter. "Always send out a thank you note right away and put a Post-it on it so you don't regive it to the same circle of friends."
Make sure it's new. Leon Foerster, an insurance agent in Ripon, Wis., recalls receiving an 8-track player full of cobwebs as a wedding gift-a sure tip-off something is not new. Post recommends you don't regift anything that does not come with its original packaging and instructions. The least you can do is rewrap the gift and put a fresh card on it. A full 16 percent of regifters were spotted because the gift tag had the wrong name on it, Tassimo found. You never want to give away a gift the original giver took great care to select, Post says, such as a homemade sweater or scarf. You should also hold on to handmade and one-of-a kind items. The most common regifted items, Tassimo found, are decorative household knickknacks like vases, paintings, and picture frames.
You can also resell. "One year my daughter was given a Mickey Mouse lamp by a relative who didn't realize she was too old for a Mickey Mouse lamp," says Collier. Her solution: Sell it on eBay. "When we're opening gifts for the holiday there is the eBay pile," says Collier, who usually lists six to eight unwanted Christmas gifts for sale on Christmas Day. "The whole point of someone giving you a gift is to make you happy," she says. "If the gift doesn't make you happy why not sell it on eBay so you can get something that will really make you happy." Only your user ID is visible when you sell something online and eBay also allows you to donate any percentage of the sale to a charity of your choice.
Gift cards are regifted too. Thirty percent of people have regifted gift cards or gift certificates, Tassimo found. Alternatively, you could sell, albeit at a discount, or swap your gift card for a different store on swapagift.com for a $3.99 listing fee, regardless of the amount on the card. "Sellers can turn their gift cards into cash," says Michael Kelly, the president and chief operating officer of the Langhorne, Pa.-based company. "Swappers can trade them for cards they really want."
Laughter is the greatest gift of all. A new website, http://www.regiftable.com/, created by the Houston-based nonprofit organization Money Management International, provides a forum for sharing regifting experiences, which range from horrifying to hilarious. One poster, Jennifer Aither, an insurance agent in Ripon, Wis., has a family tradition of regifting. For nearly 20 years a peanut butter maker has been passed off as a gift at weddings, anniversaries, and birthdays. Aither has it now, but she plans to pass it along to a cousin at an upcoming baby shower. "It's become a huge joke," Aither says. "It was so obvious to me that it was a regift that I had to laugh. It's so tacky, it's funny."
I admit, I regift. For most of my life, I would be the first to say that this is wrong. But after seeing some of the unbelievable things that people purchase for me and hating them, I have been converted. My father-in-law seems to have no idea what I want. Not a clue. Left to his own devices, the gifts are a crap-shoot and not usually right. He loves to get me one ornament for our perenially naked Christmas tree which is sappy sweet and much like a Hummel painted on a very breakable ball. I am not a Hummel person at all. He also shops painfully early, which means that I always miss getting a list to him in time to ensure I am getting something I want. And he doesn't learn. He bought my mother tea - again! How many times can one person mention that my mother doesn't drink anything hot?
But Luis is the same kind of shopper. It isn't about what the person wants to him, it is about what he feels that person should have. That is not the way I operate. My feeling is that people should get what they want. If you send me a list, I will work off of it - and feel really good about it because I know that this is something that will really make that person happy.
Isn't that the point?
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