More Sexual Dissertation...

More Sexual Dissertation...
(Or: Attack of the Killer Hormones)
Being around me has to be disconcerting...

I'm all sexed up and have no where to go. Anyone who is slightly empathic should avoid me completely - I am emoting all kinds of desire and I would have to apologise profusely. But most totally non-psi humans likely - without really knowing it or understanding it - feel quite discomfitted around me, anyway. I am giving off pheremones at an alarming level. I am always bouncing off the walls with all kinds of intense sexual energy.

It absolutely does not help that, as usual, there is someone who I am absolutely aching to have in the worst way right now. I see this person and I can't concentrate. Saying "hello" stirs up a thousand fantasies. On Friday night, I dreamt of this person - sexual dreams are the worst as you can never seem to reach the Big O and instead wake up so utterly and insatiably frustrated, that screaming blue murder would not relieve it. (Not that Luis doesn't benefit immensely from this...)

So not only am I wired for sound with insatiable desire, but I am very likely electrically shocking to anyone standing too near. Actually, this would explain a lot. The damnedest people hit on me and are attracted to me and I wonder at that - I'm overweight and it is hard to see what they find so enthralling but they do. However, if I am giving off enough pheremones to send them running off to get laid right now! then that would explain a lot. It just happens that instead of making those particular individuals grossly uncomfortable, I am making them excited and they are responding positively to my specific-gravity pheremones. OK. That does rather explain it. (I'm not flattering myself that much. The percentage that do react to me that way is tiny. Most people are outright uncomfortable.)

So as if it isn't enough to be just me, as I am a highly sexual person just normally, now I am under a biological imperative to go out and get it on with almost any male. This is the one downside to not having children (yes, there is an earlier post about this... either in December or November). My body is positively humming with sexual energy now and my doctor has told me that there is a good chance that this will continue right into menopause. YE GODS! I will be 38 in four days. I don't envision menopause for at least 10 years. Another decade of this would kill me outright! I would never have thought that I might look forward to menopause! Being this randy is not only disconcerting to others, it is off-putting to me, as well! I don't always mind it, but for the most part it intrudes at the worst moments (although I have to admit that the high intensity of emergency response is never superceded by this overbearing sexuality. That is the one situation in which I have not been at all distracted by my physical state of readiness. Or is it neediness? Well, whatever).

So maybe that is the answer. I need to ride more. More on the rig, not people!

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