A Wake

Tonight (well, last night now) I went to a wake for one of my squad members.

I always liked him and we got on well. When we were alone, we had good, close conversations. When we were with my lieutenant it was the same. He could be distant and not easy to get to know, but I made it an effort and he was one of the few individuals that I never had any issues with at all. I enjoyed his company and one thing I remember really well was that he'd come out to look at the night sky with me on nights that we were on and let me prattle on about the different stars and planets.

And suddenly, he's gone. Out among the stars, I hope.

I was upset when I'd heard the news that he died but then to go to this open-casket wake and see him there, looking... looking... I don't know. I began to cry the first trip up there. When the second round came up and then there was the whole religious thing, I cried as quietly as possible through almost of all it. After that I walked over to my lieutenant and really let loose. And then I did my 15 minutes of guard duty and we had one last trip up.

When one of our own dies, we go in two by two, and go up to the casket and salute. The three processions are part of that. Also, at all times, the casket is flanked by two of us in 15 minute shifts. I was asked if I was up to it and I said I would be honoured to do so.

But I'm upset and I miss him already.

Comments

Anonymous said…
Many people miss him too, its a shame though, that now, many have something "nice" to say.. things that should have been said when the dead were living..
7 May 2008 at 13:55
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