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Showing posts from May, 2006

That Time is Drawing Closer...!

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Oh, yes, it is nearly that time of the year again... when there are Renaissance Festivals opening to the masses! I have been working at the New York Renaissance Festival in Tuxedo, New York, for twenty years. This year is actually year 20. I'm beyond being just a Rennie! Some fun photos of Renaissance Fairs in ages past: This is a seriously OLD photo! I know this as I have not been able to fit in it for quite some time (years, really) That is a wonderful bodice and I plan to bring it back into vogue as soon as I can - just need to shed 30 lbs to do it! I can do it, I know I can I know I can!

Which Side of the Brain Am I?

This is all TLC's fault! Well. I took the first test, and this is me: Brain Lateralization Test Results Right Brain (56%) The right hemisphere is the visual, figurative, artistic, and intuitive side of the brain. Left Brain (44%) The left hemisphere is the logical, articulate, assertive, and practical side of the brain Are You Right or Left Brained? personality tests by similarminds.com Hmmm. This is what it said under that: Overall you appear to be Right Brain Dominant ----------------------------------------- According to Darwinian theory, optimal evolution takes place with random variation and selective retention. The evolution savvy individual will try many different approaches when faced with a problem and select the best of those approaches. Many historical intellectuals have confessed their advantage was simply considering/exploring/trying more approaches than others. The left brain dominant type suffers from limited approaches, narrow-mindedness. The right brain dominant ...

A Posting and A Response!

A couple of weeks ago, while aimlessly looking through other blogs, I found a new one - "Send Chocolate". I loved the title, and of course this is what grabs people's attention... not unlike a résumé, where the candidate has a mere 8 - 12 seconds to grab my attention. It did, though, and here I am telling you about it and spreading the word around that this is fun reading. I was very impressed by it and posted a comment on it: "I give you a lot of credit and I love the way you write. We probably would not see eye-to-eye in a religious sense. But I don't care and I plan to return to read your blog more. I love what you write about your kids.I am not a person who understands, appreciates, or likes kids. I like older kids that can hold their own conversation and read a lot and are clearly ahead of most people, but smaller fry are a mystery to me. Even as a kid, I preferred the company of adults. But a parent who can see the intellect in their kids and who clearly lo...

Nine Days of Rain?! Part 2

I'm happy to say that we did not have nine days of unrelenting rain! However, we did have a lot of it and some rather wacky weather as well. Friday was a wonder. It was clear enough when I drove into work at approximately 1130, but it was quite dark around 1300 and suddenly I heard something similar to a car alarm... but knew with amazing clarity what it really was. The lightening detection system! As with any sport, you have your total devotees to it, otherwise known as fanatics. And in the strange world of golf, nothing stops them from prowling the sprawling 1.5 miles and 36-holes that we provide, short of snow on the ground (which when chasing a little white pocked ball all over the land is likely to be a hell of a deterrent). They were out there in January, sans coats and gloves, happily whacking those dopey white balls all over the dull landscape. Of course, in season, there are just that many more of them zipping around now in carts as well as on foot, still chasing those te...

Walking Them to the Grave

I had written that I would make a great Grim Reaper. And the thing is, I probably would. But tonight I was the Grim Reaper, very likely, for a life not yet born. Our patient was six and a half months pregnant with a poor history in this area. Four miscarriages and zero successful births is not a positive history. The likelihood is that she was in labour when we got to the apartment at 2108 and the outcome is not too high in the good area. At approximately 22 weeks, there is not a very good chance for survival, especially due to the underdevelopment of the lungs. Is there a chance that the fetus could survive? Yes, but it is not an especially high one. The first three miscarriages were inside of the first trimester but the fourth was well into the fifth month, a stillborn. That is a hard one. The fact is that all the sirens and fast driving in the world would not make a difference. We got the patient there and up to the right place and the matter went into the hands of the hospital but ...

Yoga Part II

Well, I do still love it and I go to the gym every Tuesday evening to take the class. The class does wonders. It works out the body, calms the mind, skyrockets the endorphins and builds the confidence! What is the downside? In actual fact, there isn't one. True, I usually feel sore about mid-way through Wednesday, but I still consider that a positive sign. It means I'm getting a real workout. Oddly enough, while the poses sound easy and innocent enough (downward-facing dog, upward-facing dog, cat, tree, lotus, mountain, etc.), they are not nearly as easy as all that. I was definitely sweating profusely after a few switching of downward-facing dog, then to plank pose, then upward-facing dog. It is not simple. But then when I do child's pose, it feels SO good, I could just melt into the floor! There are some poses that are incredibly hard for me to do (plank is one of them), and others that are quite easy, like bridge pose. And then there are ones that are hard to do but I ca...

WAX is Not your Friend

For those few who tune into this on any kind of a regular basis, you may recall that I had a few postings about the losing battle of shaving that went on in the end of February through March. Or maybe just March. I had sliced one ankle, then the other, a week or so later, and was really down on the whole "better feminine hygiene through hair removal" thing... And then this showed up in my e-mail In-box today... "CAUTION: Be prepared to laugh out loud...I laughed till I almost cried as I could just see this happening! (And feel it too!) All hair removal methods have tricked women with their promises of easy, painless removal - The Epilady, scissors, razors, Nair and now... the wax. My night began as any other normal weeknight. Come home, fix dinner, and play with the kids. I then had the thought that would ring painfully in my mind for the next few hours: "Maybe I should pull the waxing kit out of the medicine cabinet." So I headed to the site of my demise: the ...

Too Much Religion

This afternoon, while surfing aimlessly along some different blogs, I found this: " Being Too Religious Every human being is a individual but every religion will give a person a identity to who there are, this will help a person to lead their life because they will have certain bondaries what they can and can't do. There are many religions in this world which people follw here are some examplesa, Lslam, christianity, hindusim and judaism. Thre rae many peole who believe in religion because they believe in one god but their are some people whho don't believe in religious because they don't believe in recreation or life after death. I believe no matter how religious a person might be there would not follow all the rules which are placed by the religion, for example, every religion believe a woman should be treated equally and should'nt be cheated on but it still happens." So, being me, I had to comment on it: "I happen to agree that too much religion can be...

Nine Days of Rain?!

Someone at the weather channel (well, the online weather) had better be way off the mark! Not that rain doesn't have its value; it does. But nine days of rain in a row fast loses its value and quickly turns into a nuisance, if not downright dangerous and poor for the community! It's one thing to perk up the flowers and make the grass a little greener. It is an entirely different creature when it cause flash flooding, long-term flooding and an increase of roadway encounters of the damaging kind. The drunks get more drunk; the drug addicts more high and the depressed overdosing - it just isn't good to have no sunlight for days on end! How is it that people live in places like Seattle or Alaska? Bad enough in Seattle where the rainy days far outweigh the clear ones. I had read once the ratio of sunny to overcast days there and it was staggering. Then there is Alaska - I'm pretty sure that their ratio of sunny to overcast days is not the best and add to that the lack of day...

This Week's Theme: Find it! 2006-05

It's that time of the year again when you get to don your word-sleuth hat. There's something common among this week's words but we're not telling --it's your task to find the property that applies to all five words this week. Each day this week brings a new word that on the surface may not appear to share a trait with the others, but does. Will you be first to solve the mystery theme? Monday, 8 April 2006 aphotic (ay-FO-tik) adjective Lightless, especially without sunlight. [From Greek a- (not) + phot- (light). Ultimately from Indo-European root bha- (to shine) that's also the source of beacon, beckon, phantom, phenomenon, and phosphorous.] The aphotic zone of an ocean or lake is the part that's not exposed to sunlight. At such depths plants grow without photosynthesis. Tuesday, 9 May 2006 plashy (PLASH-ee) adjective 1. Marshy; watery; full of puddles. 2. Splashy. [From Middle English plasch (pool), probably of imitative origin.] Wednesday, 10 April 2006 pr...

Oh, Those Crazy Religious Things...

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Today we went to a Christening (this is the exact same thing as a Baptism, so if you are thinking that there is a difference... well, there isn't. At least that I could see). It was my second Christening, and thankfully I don't see too many of those in my future. Not that it was so terrible, but you know me... religious ceremonies are not my area of comfort. It is another strange religious thing that I just don't really get on a deep-down, I-understand-why-people-do-this level. The first we went to was last summer for Bea and Rich's daughter, Jess. It was not bad - fairly short and right to the point. We also did not sit through the whole liturgy. However, it was something fairly non-denominational. This Christening today was Byzantine Catholic, and you know those Catholics... there is no end to the amount of pomp and ceremony they will throw into a basic thing. This was a beautiful ceremony in that the priest and congregation sing a lot of the words, not like Roman Cat...

Some Things Have Gender

You may not know this but many non-living things have a gender. Ziploc Bags are Male, because they hold everything in, but you can see right through them. Copiers are Female, because once turned off; it takes a while to warm them up again. It's an effective reproductive device if the right buttons are pushed, but can wreak havoc if the wrong buttons are pushed. A Tire is Male, because it goes bald and it's often over-inflated. A Hot Air Balloon is Male, because, to get it to go anywhere, you have to light a fire under it, and of course, there's the hot air part. Sponges are Female, because they're soft, squeezable and retain water. A Web Page is Female, because it's always getting hit on. A Subway is Male, because it uses the same old lines to pick people up. An Hourglass is Female, because over time, the weight shifts to the bottom. A Hammer is Male , because it hasn't changed much over the last 5,000 years, but it's handy to have around. A Remote ...

QUOTES FROM 11 YEAR OLDS' SCIENCE EXAMS

"Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin. Hydrogin is gin and water." "When you breath, you inspire. When you do not breathe, you expire." "H2O is hot water, and CO2 is cold water." "To collect fumes of sulphur, hold down a deacon over a flame in a test tube." "When you smell an odourless gas, it is probably carbon monoxide." "Nitrogen is not found in Ireland because it is not found in a free state." "Three kinds of blood vessels are arteries, vanes, and caterpillars. "Blood flows down one leg and up the other." "Respiration is composed of two acts, first inspiration, and then expectoration." "The moon is a planet just like the earth, only it is even deader." "Artificial insemination is when the farmer does it to the cow instead of the bull." "Dew is formed on leaves when the sun shines down on them and makes them perspire." "A super-sat...

Life's Great Questions

1. Never take life seriously. Nobody gets out alive anyway. 2. Life is sexually transmitted. 3. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die. 4. Men have two emotions: Hungry and Horny. If you see him without an erection make him a sandwich! 5. Give a person a fish & you feed them for a day; teach a person to use the Internet & they won't bother you for weeks. 6. Some people are like Slinkies… not really good for anything, but you still can't help but smile when you see one tumble down the stairs. 7. Health nuts are going to feel stupid someday, lying in hospitals dying of nothing. 8. Whenever I feel blue, I start breathing again. 9. All of us could take a lesson from the weather. It pays no attention to criticism. 10. Why does a slight tax increase cost you two hundred dollars and a substantial tax cut saves you thirty cents? 11. In the 60's people took acid to make the world weird. Now the world is weird and people take Prozac to make it normal....

Life’s Great Questions as Pondered by George Carlin

If you take an Oriental person and spin him around several times, does he become disoriented? If people from Poland are called "Poles", why aren't people from Holland called "Holes"? Why do we say something 'is out of whack'? What's a whack? Do infants enjoy infancy as much as adults enjoy adultery? If a pig loses its voice, is it disgruntled? Why do women wear evening gowns to nightclubs? Shouldn't they be wearing night gowns? If love is blind, why is lingerie so popular? When someone asks you, "A penny for your thoughts," and you put your two cents in, what happens to the other penny? Why is the man who invests all your money called a broker? Why do croutons come in airtight packages? It's just stale bread to begin with. When cheese gets it's picture taken, what does it say? Why is a person who plays the piano called a pianist but a person drives a race car not called a racist? Why are a wise man and a wise guy opposites? Why ...

In The Beginning...

In the beginning God created the heavens and the Earth. And the Earth was without form, and void, and darkness was upon the face of the deep. And Satan said, "It doesn't get any better than this." And God said, "Let there be light," and there was light. And God said, "Let the earth bring forth grass, the herb yielding seed, and the fruit tree yielding fruit," and God saw that it was good. And Satan said, "There goes the neighbourhood." And God said, "Let us make Man in our image, after our likeness, and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air and over the cattle, and over all the Earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the Earth." And so God created Man in his own image; male and female created he them. And God looked upon Man and Woman and saw that they were lean and fit. And Satan said, "I know how I can get back in this game." And God populated the earth with broccol...

Church Bulletin Bloopers

1. Tuesday at 4pm there will be an ice cream social. All ladies giving milk come early. 2. Thursday at 5pm there will be a meeting of the Little Mothers club. All ladies wishing to be Little Mothers please meet with the pastor in his study. 3. The ladies of the church have cast off clothing of every kind and they may be seen in the church basement on Friday afternoon. 4. A bean supper will be held on Saturday evening in the church basement. Music will follow. 5. The rosebud on the altar this morning is to announce the birth of David Alan Adams, the sin of Rev. and Mrs. Adams. 6. For those of you who have children and don't know it, we have a nursery downstairs. 7. Potluck supper. Prayer and medication to follow. 8. Don't let worry kill you - let the church help. 9. The Scouts are saving aluminum cans, bottles and other items to be recycled. Proceeds will be used to cripple children. 10. The pastor would appreciate it if the ladies of the congregation would lend him their electr...

Men Are Like...

1. Men are like laxatives: they irritate the shit out of you 2. Men are like bananas: the older they get, the less firm they are 3. Men are like weather: nothing can be done to change them 4. Men are like blenders: you need one, but you're not quite sure why 5. Men are like chocolate bars: sweet, smooth, & they usually head right for your hips 6. Men are like commercials: you can't believe a word they say 7. Men are like department stores: their clothes are always 1/2 off 8. Men are like government bonds: they take soooooooo long to mature 9. Men are like mascara: they usually run at the first sign of emotion 10. Men are like popcorn: they satisfy you, but only for a little while 11. Men are like snowstorms: you never know when they're coming, how many inches you'll get or how long it will last 12. Men are like lava lamps: fun to look at, but not very bright 13. Men are like parking spots: all the good ones are taken, the rest are handicapped But... we still love ...

Political Correctness Taken Too Far

Due to the climate of political correctness now pervading America, Kentuckians, Tennesseans and West Virginians will no longer be referred to as “hillbillies”. You must now refer to them as Appalachian Americans. And furthermore, how to speak about women and be politically correct: 1. She is not a “babe” or a “chick” - she is a “breasted American” 2. She is not a “screamer”, a whiner or a “moaner” - she is “vocally appreciative” 3. She is not “easy” - she is “horizontally accessible” 4. She is not a “dumb blonde” - she is a “light-haired detour off the information superhighway” 5. She has not “been around” - she is a “previously-enjoyed companion” 6. She is not an “airhead” - she is “reality impaired” 7. She does not get “drunk” or “tipsy” - she gets “chemically inconvenienced” 8. She does not have “breast implants” - she is “medically enhanced” 9. She does not “nag” you - she becomes “verbally repetitive” 10. She is not a “tramp” - she is “sexually extroverted” 11. She does not have “...

Happy Beltane!

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My first day of May this year was great - not only was it Beltane, a very big holiday for us Wiccans, but it was also 69's extrication drill, a treat that does not happen as often as one would like. The weather was perfect and the sun shone in a beautiful blue sky, just as the weather should be! I love May Day or Beltane or Walpurgis Day (take your pick). The Picts and Gaels did not see eye-to-eye on their gods (the Gaels believed that the Oak King ate children and was mostly a cruel and vicious god, missing teeth and you get the idea. The Picts did not quite subscribe to that. But that mostly was Samhain (also one of my favourite holidays) that involved blood sacrifice and the Oak King (modern Wiccans do not believe in having blood sacrifice, I might add). Beltane is a fertility holiday. The usual thing is to jump over a bonfire skyclad and then pair off with whomever you would like. Wiccans are a little more accepting of sex with others. It's said that a baby conceived during...