Five years on this sqaud, and not much really drives me crazy. I'm accustomed to the bullshit, the lying, the rumour mill, etc. But then one person told everyone that she had a bird's eye view of my husband's penis. That is completely rediculous, so for once, I actually addressed the rumour mill instead of letting it go:

"One of the most stupid and unbelievable things is how much people love to have dirt. In the absence of real dirt, they'll make it up.

One of my squadmates was kind enough to drop off the meeting attendance notes and I very much appreciate that; however, I do not appreciate the subsequent tall tales circulating about my husband's state of dress. He threw on pants and opened the door. He is very, very private and would not ever appear without zipping up his pants. He also did not parade in front of the picture window naked as he was not naked to begin with.

It is a public fact that I like to be in my own house naked. We never use our living room (it has no telly) and the picture window has furniture in front of it. You guys are welcome to say all the things you wish about me; that's fine and I don't care. (And it's almost all been said before, anyway!) Do NOT make up vitriolic lies concerning my family because you cannot find anything better to discuss.

If you weren't the one who said this to all, then just ignore it. If you are, learn from it. Rumours are hurtful to other people and unkind to those you work with in a "family" such as ours. Don't say anything. You'll be the better for it.

This is not a federal case. I don't care who the lying party is. This is an end to it.

Thank you."

One of my other mates wrote me back:


Doris is wonderful and always supportive, and I really like her. She's stood up for me before on other issues and I find that admirable. I'm not super-popular within the squad, which again, is fine. I'm an odd duck. But you know something, I do not contribute to the rumour pool. I don't have anything to do with it. I know who the person is who did this. I honest believe that this individual doesn't think s/he had done anything out-of-bounds, or that someone else might be affected by this. But I hate that. If you want to pick on me "behind my back", have at it. Picking on my husband (in a manner of speaking) is not acceptable. I know it wasn't meant to hurt, it was meant to give this person a higher standing in the squad (very often rumours are used as a way of ingratiating one's self with others). That still does not make it right.

This person is not a bad person (although hearing every personal medical problem is a bit annoying. No one should use his or her own problems and his or her family's medical problems as a tool for... what? Popularity? One-upping? Whatever it is. (I'm not expressing myself right... s/he's not doing this on a conscious level. It is something ingrained. I guess it is a way of establishing importance... no, that's not quite right either.) But you know what I mean...
It's worth it.


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