Time

It seems like no matter how much you think you have, it is never enough.

Time seems to weigh heavy on the human race. We can only move in one direction through it: forward. And even if we are mired in the past, stuck in the present or trying to live in the future, it still moves at its steady, stalwart pace, and just in that one direction. But we always want it to hurry up... or slow down... or stay in a moment, but it ignores our pleas to remain where, or should I say, when, we are happiest.

And that is the thing about time. At work, I never have enough. And I love my job, but I won't give up my other parts of life for it, as I won't give up working for other areas of life. It is all of my life, and I make sure to break it down into equal parts. I want life to be special. If I neglect or give up time in one facet, then I am cheating myself - and that part of my life, be it work, Luis, family (parents and realtives), friends, or my own alone-time. I try to slice the pie as evenly as possible.

But time... I need more.

And what would I do with more time? There really is a lot of it. I guess the real problem with time is that I just don't know how much of it I really have. I could die tomorrow (I certainly hope not but it could happen) or I might not be slated to die until 5 July 2048 (which would make me a little over 80 years and six months old. Not bad...). I don't know. If I knew, for example, that my ETD (estimated time of death) would be 14:38. Friday, 13 October 2017, what would I do with that knowledge? Well, I would not tell my employer, obviously. I have to be honest, talk about incentive to replace me. Not right away, maybe, but not too far down the road. I might start actively training someone in early 2017, but I would not let on until much closer to my end date that this is my ETD. But I would definitely make sure I travel. I would do heaps of travelling! I would make sure that my cats (I always have cats) will be taken care of. I would be sure to have a will ready. And I would pretty much continue as I have, with one exception. If cutting out sugar and learning to eat vegetables would change that ETD or push it off longer, well, I would make those changes, too.

But as much as I fall into the trap of thinking that I don't have time, I do think I live life to its fullest each and every day. I may not use my time as wisely as I should, but I can't look back and say I haven't jam packed it full of good, worthwhile living; that I robbed myself of experiences I wanted to have. I try to live as best as I can and as much as I can. Life is worth it. Life is wonderful and full of great things to try. To do. To experience. To learn - oh, that is by far my favourite thing is to learn. And every day I do learn.

So I live each day as though it were my last. My watch keeps ticking and I keep ticking with it.

PS. The clocks will be going back soon, just a couple of days. This is good for many, bad for me. More sleepless times, more issues with getting up and functioning well in the morning. Talk about what time can do to one. I love time, but I do not love when my mornings have shifted into daylight (which will disappear soon enough), and my evenings into darkness by 1730, which in the "dead" of winter will mean the sun is setting around 1630 - ugh! So by 1830 it feels like midnight.

Yikes!