Tuesday, 5 August 2008

TMI Tuesday: Romance Edition

I strongly suspect that sex will come up in this meme, but let's see what they've got...

1. What is your definition of romantic?

Mmmmm, a quiet night in each other's company, laughing, doing something together and touching, always together, never apart. Sex is not romance, there is a huge difference.

2. Would you consider yourself to be romantic?

Me, yes, I am. I love music, candles, a nice dinner together, some tender gentle lovemaking, the whole package. But we are often romantic as stated in the answer to number 1.

3. Is your significant other romantic?

Not nearly so much. He does occasionally make the effort for me, but in and of himself he is not romantic.

4. Have you ever chastised a SO for not being romantic enough or too romantic?

No, not really. Sometimes I will sarcastically tell Luis, "You really know how to suck the romance out of [something]!" but we both laugh at that. I am practical and find the kind of romance that most women seem to require sappy.

5. What do you consider a grand romantic gesture? Have you ever been the recipient or giver of one?

Well, sure. Both, really. I've done crazy-romantic stuff and had it done to me.

6. If you have done something romantic to get laid, did it work? If not, why and how did that affect your romantic tendencies in the past.

See? What did I tell you?

Oh, sure. I do romantic stuff to Luis all the time to initiate sex - and purely for that reason! When it doesn't work, I will finally just demand that he hurry up with dinner and give it to me. Sometimes subtlety is wasted.

7. What is the most romantic thing you have ever done? Had done for you?

Oooooh, let me think. The most romantic thing done to me... well... I don't know. Oh, yes. I do. Years ago, when we were first together, Luis bought me a surprise gift, a wooden heart with "Luis & Aislinge" engraved in it. It is hanging up in this house, as it has in all of them, 18.5 years later.

The most romantic thing I did was light candles, put on music and muddled my way through making a dinner that a child could make - but since I don't cook in any fashion, it really was very romantic.

I never "require" that Luis get me flowers for anything, least of all Valentine's Day. I think once you make anything a requirement and suck the fun and spontinaety out of it, it is no longer a holiday or a romantic thing, but a tactic to keep the other party happy and avoid a fight. I know far too many women who expect flowers and/or chocolates for holidays and events and I hate that. Doesn't it make you think that he's only doing it because it is easier than having you pissed off over some imagined slight or - even better - a pissing contest with other women?

I worked with one woman in Miller's Harness who made it a requirement that her husband had - absolutely had - to get her huge bouquets of flowers that absolutely had to be sent to the workplace. She told me that. I remember remarking that this doesn't sound like love if you are making him do this. But we really didn't see eye-to-eye on anything. I also made her take the roses home that night, as they made me miserable. When I was younger, the damn things made my eyes swell shut and I would sneeze over and over and over. I'm still quite allergic to flowers, but as I get older, the allergy slowly gets better.

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